The Nintendo DS seems like it would make the perfect eBook reader. It's more compact than the Sony Reader or the Kindle, is shaped like a book, and is hundreds of dollars cheaper. While Nintendo hasn't quite caught on to how awesome this is, the DS homebrew community has and now anyone can turn their DS into an eReader as good as any Kindle.

Once you have switched to eBooks, you won't want to go back to paper. I have been using my DS as an eBook reader for months, and I love it. I carry it with me everywhere. The DS is smaller than the smallest paperback, and can hold hundreds of novels. My wife owns a copy of the book I am currently reading on my DS (The Mists of Avalon by Marion Zimmer Bradley). Her copy weighs over a pound. Mine is tiny and fits in my pocket.

Seriously, give this a try.

This Youtube video might give you a sense of what the experience will be like. It demonstrates several pieces of software, the first of which is DSLibris, the subject of this tutorial. My apologies for the German - it was the only video I could find.

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The last time the United States economy was worse than it is today, there were millions of people living a semi-nomadic lifestyle. People would travel from county to county, state to state, or across the country from job to job. These people lived out of their cars and ate whatever they could.

That time was, of course, the Great Depression. Unfortunately for us, it looks like bad times might be rolling on in again, like the billowing clouds of the dust bowl.

After seventy years of good times, Americans have lost the skills necessary to survive such a storm. We are a pampered people.

Fortunately, we also have the Internet, a treasure trove of information our ancestors could never have had access to.

Without further ado, I would like to present:

Surviving the Recession: Lesson 1, living on the road with nothing but your car and your wits.

Part 1. How to steal gas, from Cheech and Chong

If you are going to spend your days driving around, looking for fruit that needs picking and ditches that need digging, you will need some gas. Unfortunately, gas costs money. Even though the price of gas has plummeted since the summer, the cost will add up.

In a dog-eat-dog world, you are going to need to learn how to steal gas right out of someone's tank. All you need is a tube, a container, and a pair of lungs.

Chong has the basic concept down: by drawing any liquid in a container up through a tube - in this case gasoline - and bringing the opening of that tube below the surface of the liquid it will begin to drain.

Nevertheless, they made many many mistakes. To perform this illegal (it is, after all, stealing) maneuver remember to:

• Use an empty container with a narrow opening so it does not slosh and so it is easier to pour, such as a milk jug or a proper gas can.
• Use a clear plastic tube to draw the gas out so you can see it before you get a mouthful.
• Just be cool, man.

There are plenty of people on the Internet who advocate what are arguably better methods of stealing gas, like this guy. But those methods also involve buying expensive pumps and tubing. If you can afford all that, you are better off just buying the gas.

Part 2. How to skin a squirrel, from some redneck on Youtube.

Admit it: you've looked at the squirrels running around campus and thought, "damn, that looks tasty."

Anyone can hunt a squirrel. Every movie in history involving people stuck in the wild has a scene where the main characters hunt and eat small animals. Monkey see, monkey do: you know how to catch a squirrel if you have seen these movies. Make a trap or something.

After the beast is nabbed, movies always cut to a shot of the characters eating said small animal. The actual preparation is never covered.

Have no fear: YouTube is here.

This guy has his own "squirrel skinning knife," as though he does this often enough that he has a knife dedicated to just that purpose.

On second thought, tuna is a cheap, wholesome source of protein that doesn't involve blood and fur.

Part 3. Cook food on your car's hot engine, from some people who think they are hot shit

You are going to need a way to cook that squirrel once you have it nice and clean. Unfortunately for you, ovens are a luxury for those lucky enough to have homes. All you have is your car, a dead squirrel and some stolen gas. If you can get your hands on some tin foil, then you have all you need for a satisfying, filling meal.

This video is for hotdogs, but it still applies to what we are doing. Just put the food in tin foil and find a nice hot part of your engine to stick it on. If you have butter or oil, try spreading some of that on the tin foil so your food doesn't stick to it. You can also use metal wire to keep the food firmly in place

As in the video, canned food can also be cooked this way. All you need to do is vent the can and put it somewhere secure.

More detailed instructions on car engine cooking can be found here.

Part 4: Sleep in your car, from Howcast

With the sun set and your belly full of squirrel, its time to go to bed. You can't afford a hotel room, but the next best thing is your car. Think about it: unlike a tent or cardboard box, its waterproof (well, most of the time). That alone makes it above all other options. Nevertheless, it has limitations. But don't worry, the Internet is here to help.

By now, you can survive on your own on the road. All you need now is how to protect your hoard of squirrel meat and gasoline from angry mobs of people, and you are set.

If there are any other skills you feel would be necessary to learn to surviving the recession, feel free to comment below.